Dick Schmelzkopf 2004

Irene ain't so mean
She put together a book that's an out machine.
Do you have all the three-dart outs memorized?
Or have you thrown a dart then been surprised?

Has every pub you've shot in had an out chart?
Or do you know them all and you're that smart?
I'll bet sometimes you'd like a choice on your outs.
I've changed my mind of that there's no doubts.

On your out the first dart didn't go where you wanted,
This could make you become quite daunted.
If you had Irene's little out book,
You could change your plan and take another look.

This is made in the U.S.A. by a great shooter.
This out book makes a great tutor.
"Every dart counts", that's a snappy little saying.
Don't throw one on the floor keep on playing.

She also says, "Thanks for the game".
As a winner she's a classy dame.
"Be one with the board." Sounds like Zen to me.
Ain't it the truth, don't you see.

"Thanks for the lesson." Is what you say if you lose.
We've all lost one some time it will give you the blues.
Some dart trivia for those who are into that sort of thing.
This book can make you a darty queen or king.

I wouldn't play a game without this dart out chart.
Now, advise to my teammates I can impart.
Those that know Dick may laugh about this,
But without Irene's book I would be remiss.

I didn't know how to get there before,
Since I read her book I know how to score.
Now a 170 out looks like a piece of cake.
Two triple 20s and a double bull I can make.

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